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GUIDANCE LIST: 

1. Moving Out of the Home You Shared. Congratulations! You're moving away from the space you shared with an abuser and all the memories it holds. We know how important that is for the next step of stability for the mental health of your new family unit! Hear us when we say: make sure you utilize the Safe at Home program your state likely has. 42 states currently have them at last count, so it's likely yours will. This program allows you to have: 

   • a substitute legal address that you can use for things like: ​

     • driver's license address​

     • vehicle registration address

     • insurance address

     • banking address

     • addresses for most things

   • this means you will have to vote absentee but you can still vote! Your Safe at Home office will process your local and national voting activities for you! ​

   • If you live in the State of Iowa, click here to get started once you have your new address information. 

   • If you're moving to a house you will own, please note the additional step you will need to take as a homeowner to conceal your new address.

2. Financial Security & Investments. You worked on your debt situation. Once you've got that under control, you want to keep going. We want to encourage you to position your family for generational wealth! Start with your bank or credit union and inquire about these steps:

   • Helping you start savings 

   • Help you learn how to balance your bank account

   • Get you to the point where you can invest

   • Help you learn how to invest and get you started

   • Help you get life insurance for your unique situation

   • Help you establish &/or update wills, trust funds, etc., that make sure if something happens to you that your children aren't forced to live with the abuser as well as to protect their money from the abuser

3. Home Ownership. If you already own a home, you may need help with a refinance to lower your ​payments. If you've been wanting to be a homeowner, wait until the divorce is final if you were legally married, and then get busy! Here's what you want the professional you choose to be equipped to do: 

   • Utilize relationships he/she/they have established to get better rates on your loan

   • Teach you how to pay off your home loan more quickly

   • Walk you through the steps to ensure you are a homeowner with good rates

   • Teach you how to pay off your home loan more quickly

***Make sure you are financially ready to hire an attorney to set up a trust for you. That will keep the abuser from being able to use your new purchase to find you again.*** 

1. Work You Love that Pays! (a/k/a Abuse Reparations). As we spoke about on our home page in our Philosophy section, we demand abuse pay our Black Sisters back for what it took from you because YOU WON THE WAR! We want you to know that there are so many ways to monetize the knowledge you gained and honed during this unthinkable experience! ​

   • One way is to find the employment working for someone else that utilizes the things you are naturally good at. You'll want to find a good resume writer to tell the right story:

     • Transferable skills. The work you've done over the past 5-10+ years that are the skills that a person successful in the role you want should have are the only ones that need to be discussed in your updated resume. VPs and other hiring leaders have repeatedly told us they want to see the story that shows you've already repeatedly demonstrated the skills that have brought measurable success in the past to tell them you'll be successful in the role they need to fill. It's tempting to tell someone everything you've done in your past jobs, but stick to bullet points for each job that has the appropriate transferable skills ;)

     • Education. If you got the degree in the last 5 years, put the year, if not, simply put your degree, the school, and its location. Of course, always put any significant info such as 4.0 throughout the program, magna cum laude, dean's list, international internship, etc., as a bullet point below the education. If you have several degrees, only use the ones pertinent to the transferable skills. If you have several certifications, the same applies.

     • Name & Address. Most employers want to know that you are local to the position and aren't looking for them to relocation you ($). For your safety post-separation and to eliminate bias toward certain areas of town that may considered 'poor' or 'bad', simply put the nearest main city and state.

     • Pages. The maximum is 2, the preferred is 1. Even if you have a long work history, if you're sticking to the transferable skill method 2 will get it done. Hiring leadership will not want to bother with more. 

     • ​References. If you have them, list them on a separate sheet that matches the style, font, etc., of your resume. Make sure your reference info is up to date, and all you need is name, title, company, email, and phone number. Better to eliminate the extra sheet of paper than to get these wrong, Sis.​

     • Cover Letter. If they ask for one, include it; please leave it out if they don't. Less is more; the resume process is designed to get you the interview not the job. 

   • The other way is to take the ways you've grown and create a niche business! We're partial to seeing this happen because there is so much more autonomy in this scenario. True, it's hard work - however, all the hard work is YOUR credit and benefit too! There are so many supports in place for starting your own business in most states across this country, so start with your state's Small Business Administration and/or your state's Secretary of State. If you live in Iowa, reach out to our sister, Courageous Fire, LLC, and tell them you would like the email that has the process of how to start your own single-member LLC​, and they'll send it to you to get you started! Either way, get PAID BACK - you deserve it! ​